It was the best of times,,,,,,no not even remotely close, “IT” was ONLY the worst of times!
I remember hearing stories about “IT” since I was a small child. Most of the stories were comical.
As I grew older, I began to hear about people “IT” had actually happend to. “IT” wasn’t comical to them anymore.

The Path to “IT”:

YESTERDAY:

3:45PM:  At this time, I was having a great day. In fact, thoughts of me watching sweet 16 games yet played ran through
my little cranium, meals I had yet to eat but knew I would. I was reading an awesome artical in S.I.

3:50PM: “Jim.....” the woman said “Jim.” That’s me I thgought as I jumped to my feet, putting down the S.I. that was 6 months old.
Yes, I was going to get a physical. Nothing to it, right? Just make sure all is well in Fort Fuchuck.

3:55PM: And it was, that is until Dr. Goldman looked me in the eye and said “I noticed your almost 40.”
Just when I was about to answer yes,,,,,,,,my MIND EXPLODED!!!!!!! (Wait, 40, rubber glove, lube----is “IT” going to happen? Oh no “IT” is going to happen. Whreres my mom?)

4:00PM: Braced against a table, dreading the next few moments--No not “IT”,,,,,,I almost fainted.......

4:01PM: After the Dr. began his assult on me, I immediately set a new vertical record for myself by jumping 59 inches. Previous high, 18.

4:03PM: After the assult and as soon as my feet hit the ground, these words leave my mouth “I didn’t do it. It wasn’t me. I don’t belong in prison!”

4:05-til present: Lets just say, I havn’t been the same. Don’t think I ever will be.

But I will tell you this, unfortunately, “IT” lived up to hype. “IT” stunk.